Wedding Procedures

The Blessings & Celebration of Your Marriage

“Give them wisdom and devotion in the ordering of their common life, that each may be to the other a strength in need, a counselor in perplexity, a comfort in sorrow and a companion in joy.”
BCP p 429

We rejoice with you as you prepare for the sacrament of holy matrimony, and we are pleased that you have chosen to celebrate this moment in the presence of your parish family here at St. James. To that end, the Worship Commission has developed a set of guidelines to insure that your wedding is a meaningful beginning to marriage.

Marriage is celebrated within the context of the Church’s life of prayer, worship and witness. The rubrics of the Book of Common Prayer, and the Canons of the Church - both National and Diocesan -set the foundational norms for the solemnization of Holy Matrimony in the Episcopal Church.

Christian marriage is both a prophetic symbol and reality that has two parts. The first is the foundational level which celebrates the community of life and love between a man and woman who are disciples of Jesus. The symbolic or sacramental level is the reflection and representation in this community of the community of life and love between Christ and Christ’s people, the church.

A couple entering into any marriage say to one another before the society in which they live: “I love you and give myself to you.” A Christian couple entering into Christian marriage say all of that and more. They say also: “I love you just as Jesus loves us, his Church and we invite him into our relationship.” A Christian marriage is not just a wedding ceremony. It is also a loving and equal partnership of life to be lived. When they covenant in marriage, Christian spouses commit themselves to explore together in their married life the religious depth of their existence, and to respond to that depth in the light of their Christian faith.

Our norms and guidelines are listed below. We hope that they will serve as a guide for you in your planning for your wedding day and marriage.

General Information & Policies

• Weddings at Saint James are normally celebrated for members of the parish, their extended families (as long as they belong to and are members of record at another church), and those who decide to become a part of the St. James community.
• It is recommended that notice be given to the church at least six months in advance so that there is adequate time for planning and for the necessary pre-marital counseling to take place.
• Saturday weddings may be scheduled between 11:00 am and 3:00 pm or after 6:30 pm.
• Weddings are not held during the liturgical season of Lent or on Christmas Eve.
• It is the usual custom of this parish to celebrate weddings in the Church.
• At least one of the persons to be married must have been baptized and now lives out their faith in the Episcopal Church.

Step by Step

1. Meet with the Clergy - Before any other plans are made, call the church office to make an appointment with the priest. At this meeting, basic information about the wedding and its participants is gathered. This visit also gives the couple and the priest time to become acquainted with one another. The couple will receive from the priest any other information that they will need to begin the process. It is never too early to call the church about your wedding plans. This initial meeting is very important as schedules need to be set, preparations for all parties considered, and requirements of canon law fulfilled.
2. Spiritual Preparation - During the preparation time the couple will engage in a series of meetings (usually 3 or 4) with the priest or others delegated by the priest to assist in this area. These sessions will present the theology of marriage and discuss other practical and spiritual aspects of married life. It is at the conclusion of these sessions that the officiating priest and the couple will begin to plan and make decisions about the actual wedding ceremony.
3. Wedding Rehearsal - In order to help all participating to have a clear understanding of their roles in the ceremony, wedding rehearsals are usually scheduled for the day preceding the wedding. The Priest will be assisted in the rehearsal by a representative of the church’s wedding guild. No other assistance or wedding planners are needed. You must bring your marriage license to the wedding rehearsal.
4. The Wedding - The day is finally here! Congratulations! All of the diligent planning you have done is completed. Please remember that the ceremony will begin promptly at the time you have chosen. Try to relax and enjoy the gift that this day is for you.

Specific Guidelines

Marriage License
A valid marriage license issued by the Henderson County Clerk of Records must be in the hands of the priest no later than the scheduled time of your wedding rehearsal.

The Ceremony
Choose the scriptural readings for the service; decide if Holy Eucharist will be celebrated (no private Holy Communions for the Bride and Groom alone); begin to think about the Wedding Procession into and out of the Church.

Music
The Director of Music at St. James Church is responsible for all music that will be performed at your wedding ceremony. You are asked to arrange a consultation with the Director of Music at least one month prior to the wedding. All music at the wedding ceremony must be sacred or classical. Popular romantic music as well as taped music is not appropriate and will not be permitted. Please remember that the music you select will set the tone and enhances a sense of dignity for our worship. If the Director of Music consents to have an “outside” organist play for your wedding, the Director at St. James is still entitled to the standard fees.

Altar Flowers
Altar flowers are given for the Glory of God and remain in the church through Sunday. Window candles are available for your use. No other candles or stands are to be brought into church. It would be helpful if your florist inquired about the traditions of St. James. Pew bows or arrangements can be used without the use of any kind of tape on pews.

Photography
Photographers, either professional or amateur, may not take flash pictures during the ceremony. They must consult with the officiating clergy person at least a half hour before the ceremony. Time lapse photography works very well here. Members of the congregation are not permitted to use cameras during the service. Video taping of the wedding ceremony is permitted provided that 1 - there is no extra lighting equipment and 2 - the cameras are on a fixed tripod and out of any visual line of sight. PLEASE NOTE - The church is available after the wedding ceremony for photographs to be taken for THIRTY MINUTES. The sexton will begin closing the church at that time. Please cooperate. 

Other Items of Importance

• All of the facilities of St. James Church are smoke free. There is to be no smoking inside any part of our buildings. There are ashtrays and cigarette receptacles outside each door.
• There is to be no consumption of alcohol or any other mind altering drug on the campus of St. James either before or after the wedding ceremony. The clergy reserve the right to disallow the participation of any member of the wedding party who is intoxicated or unable to conduct themselves in a responsible manner.
• There are facilities for the bride and her attendants to dress here at the church. It is customary for the groom and groomsmen to come to the church already dressed.

Schedule of Fees

An honorarium for the priest is at the discretion of those being married. However, for non-members or those couples without a record of giving, there is an honorarium of $300.

The following fees apply to all weddings:

Fees for soloists or other musicians are in addition to the above. Please keep in mind that a wedding includes a lot of behind-the-scenes work and time and effort of many people.